I don't know what is going on, but lately I haven't been feeling like my usually, awesome self. One my say that I am in a runt. I don't know when this actually began, but one day I just felt nothing. I didn't feel happy, sad, or anything in between. It's like all my emotions have left the building, and I am just a empty, soulless, shell of my former self. It seems like all my creative juices, and awesome vibes have been replaced with just working all the time. In a nutshell, you can say that I Have become a cooperate robot....*Plays horror music*
Now to be fair, I can not blame my current issue on just my job. Everyone has to work in order to do just about anything. I see plenty of my friends working, but still find the time/energy to have fun and enjoy life. Some find time to travel, some find time to party, hell some even find time to start up their own businesses. If everyone else is doing such awesome things, then why can't I do the same as well? To be honest, I don't know.
If I am to be completely honest with myself, I am doing the one thing I am tell people not to do: just exist. I truly not living life to the fullest. In fact, it really feels like I am just settling. Settling with having a job that pays less than $8 a hour. Settling for still being in my hometown while just about everyone i know from her has left and started a new phase in their lives. Settling for living at home with my family. Last but not least, settling for the fact that my dreams, goals, and ideas or just too unrealistic to come true. Boy, when did I turn into a lame version of myself???
What can be down to get my groove back? To be honest, the answer is so simple. Basically I need to do three things. The first thing is to get back to what made me who I am/was in the beginning. That means getting back to my art, getting back to discovering new and exciting music, getting back to writing, and getting back to following my dreams and making them a reality. Basically, I need to reignite, and follow my passion. The second thing is I need to move. I am believe your environment has a huge factor in the energy have. Lately, my current surrounds have not been sparking the creative energy that lies within me. Every time I leave and go out of town of the other hand, I feel inspired once again the the mojo comes back in full force. Last but certainly not least, I have to trust and have faith in the plan that God has for me. Everything happens for a reason, and I do believe all of this is a part of a bigger picture. I believe that for to do what God has planned for me, I have to go through all of this to become a strong and better person than I am currently. The good book say that God will not put more on than you care bear.
In summary, am I a slump right now? Yes I am. Will things get better? Eventually, I don't know when. In reality, all I truly know is this is happening for a reason. What that reason is I have the slightest idea. Whatever the reason is, I hope that will be able to see it, and learn from the experience. All in all, while things may not be ideal in my life right now, things could be way worse. I won't complain about how things are right. I just going to embrace this phase in my life, learn from it, and my the necessary changes to it. Sooner or later, I will return to my awesome self once again. As chance the rapper say in Good Ass Intro, "Even better than i was the last time baby ohh ohh ohh ohh ohh I'm good." Well folks, that is it for now. Until next time...Live, Be Great, Do Dope Shit.
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